Lessons From My Failures

Sometimes I take my life lessons from Olivia Pope. If you don’t watch Scandal you need to get on that. Total girl crush right here.

The best thing about Olivia is her famous line “It’s handled.”

My question for you is, are you handling your shit? What I mean by this is are you trying to set a goal, failing and then repeating this crazy cycle over and over, wondering why it doesn’t ever work and things don’t change?

What I mean by this is that YOU didn’t change. You’re expecting extravagant results in a goal but you didn’t change yourself.

Your thoughts, habits and actions didn’t REALLY change.

You just relied on will power and “motivation” to achieve that goal.

Shit didn’t get handled, because it becomes a vicious cycle of…

Set a goal —> get excited —> will power and white knuckle through a few weeks —> decide it’s not worth it —> stop

Success is stopped by many things, fear being a big one.

Today I wanted to share with you a lesson I learned from my consistent failures.

I was scared, big time. I didn’t realize it at the time but here’s what continued to happen…

I would set a goal, do it for a while and then become disinterested. I would stop that process and claim that I didn’t really care about the goal so I wasn’t into it.

I would stop keeping score.

Then I would ultimately just say that I hate setting goals, it’s stupid and I don’t need it.

After doing a lot of personal development I realized my issue…

I was scared. It took a long time to figure this because initially I was like “F that, I’m not scared

I just didn’t know WHAT I was scared of.

It was this….

Scared of success

I was unsure that I could handle the result of that success. Was I good enough to take the business to that level? Could I handle it as a leader and as the owner?

And I see this a lot when it comes to weight loss too. People are so freaked out about the future.

Can I handle the success? Do I deserve to feel this good and happy?

What if I can’t maintain it?

What will people think?

We manifest these questions based on something we have no way to predict and it cripples us.

We ultimately let it RULE our lives and LIMIT us from actually living. That’s pretty f-ed up if you ask me, it’s not fair to us but we do it constantly.

So where in your life are you holding back because of fear of the future?

How did I combat this? I got a good support group. My mentor and my business group keep me on track. I have people to tell me I’m on the right track, celebrate my successes and also just keep me in check.

So the task for you after reading this blog is, think about where in your life are you afraid to keep score and to admit what you’re afraid of?

Secondly, figure out who can help you with that. Most of the time to comes back to being able to be honest with yourself and with others.

Callie Durbrow